Oh boy. I just finished writing 50,000 words. It’s going to resemble a novel. I’ve already determined 12,000 words won’t make it into the final draft. I feel totally drained. It took every gram of courage and focus to write this damn thing. I spent so much time on this beast. I’m not even sure I’ll feel proud of the product. I don’t know if it will all be worth it. I’ll promise I’ll publish it, but I can’t promise that I’ll love my own creation. I’m proud of myself for pushing through, but not necessarily the end product. I have nearly fallen entirely out of love with writing and not only considered giving up NaNoWriMo, but writing all together. It was such a painful process. Soon I’ll say I’m a published author, and I can keep publishing short stories. I don’t think I ever want to write a novel again. I sacrificed nearly everything to get it done. My diet and exercize went out the window. My room is a mess. I stopped reading and dancing. It feels like a hollow victory. Bleh.
December is going to be busy, so I won’t do any editing then. Expect it to be on Amazon for $1 in February. I’ll give free digital copies to all of my subscribers as a thank you for supporting me.
- Books
- Orange is the New Black, by Piper Kerman
- Movies
- Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them
- The Martian
- The Matrix
- Blog posts published = 12 (some of those were written in October and published in November)
- Gym
- Twice a week for the first two weeks, then I gave up. Time to jump back on the horse
- Diet
- Ok for the first half of the month. I ate a lot of Taco Bell and ramen for the second half.
- I flew to Denver for Thanksgiving and seeing family
- Single mindedness gets results, but at what cost? AT WHAT COST I ASK YOU? I lost passion on a subject near and dear to my heart: learning the truth (what my novel is about). I am the champion of that cause. I had a message I desperately wanted the world to hear. I poured my heart and soul into that thing, and there’s not much left in me. I’m so glad it’s over. I’m ready to go back to normal (my level of normal). That was insanity. There are other media I can use which I will be experimenting with in the future.
“Ok last time I was wrong about next month, but this time is different.” is going to be my eptiaph.
- I’m going to take a long break from even thinking about my novel. Come January I’ll have fresh eyes. I’ll add punctuation, send it to my editor, approve changes, and hopefully have it published in February.
- I did one week of selling life insurance. I loved it! It was exciting and new. I meet the kindest, most polite, hospitible people. I’m looking forward to a career here.
- I was going to move to New Hampshire this month, but then I changed my mind. I’ll be here until May at least.
Whew. That information was eye opening. I will say, what I have read – I HAVE VERY MUCH ENJOYED !!!!! I believe you are a VERY skilled writer. I look forward to hearing about what ever you chose to do. 🙂
Cousin,
Wonderful work, and I love your introspection!
Plans (Life) changes, and you have proven yourself able to dance out loud when those changes are exciting, and to roll with the punches when things don’t go as expected.
Thank you for sharing!
Brenda