Why I’m (Slowly) Giving up Alcohol

I’m slowly giving up alcohol. It’s not about feeling superior, or a principal, or risk of addiction. I simply don’t like alcohol.

What’s the best part of a mimosa? The orange juice. Jack and Coke? The Coke. They sell a beer called a Vanilla Java Porter and it does sound delicious, until I realize that “vanilla java” sounds delicious, “porter” sounds just ok.

When I say a certain beer tastes “good”, what I mean is that the beer tastes good compared to other beers. I’ve never had a beer that tasted better than soda. The best beer I’ve had is only the best because I didn’t have soda at the time.

As much fun as it is to be “buzzed”, it’s never as much fun as being high on caffeine. In fact, I’ve never done any activity that was more fun buzzed than it was sober. I love water pong, board games, video games, parlor games, and dancing. I enjoy all of them more when I’m sober.

Sure, drinking lowers your inhibitions and gives you “confidence”, but where’s the challenge? I love this quote, “Don’t wish it was easier, wish you were better.” I don’t want talking to girls to be easier, I just want to be better at it.

There are certain factors which will complicate giving up drinking. First off, it’s a social thing to do. If we as a society casually consumed heroin instead of beer at parties, it would be hard to avoid heroin. If we casually beat people to death at parties, it would be hard to avoid beating people to death at parties. If you want to be part of the herd, you have to do what the herd does. We’re social animals. It’s, unfortunately, inevitable. Luckily, we seem to be stuck with alcohol.

What do you think? Right? Wrong? Pure poppycock?