Why I don’t fear Socialists or National Socialists

As a die hard Capitalist, I’m comforted by the ease and effectiveness of my philosophy. I know many capitalists are worried that socialists taking over, or Nazis taking over. Rest assured, they’ve already taken over. The worst part has already happened. For at least 2500 years we’ve been ruled by the various cruel and well meaning.

I don’t fear socialists because they tend to care about feelings too much. They always want to take a vote, which takes time and energy. It’s much more efficient to make unilateral decisions and have everything work out. That’s how capitalism works. Everyone acts in their own self interest, and then people get what they need and want. I want coffee, and all I have to do is buy it from Starbucks. Starbucks pays someone else to ship coffee. Someone else farms the coffee beans. Someone else makes fertilizer. Someone else makes farm tools. Not a single one of the thousands of people cares one lick about David getting his coffee, and yet, I still get coffee. The prospect of farm tool makers having to vote on which farm tools to make, and then fertilizer companies having to vote on the composition of nitrogen in the fertilizer, and then a shipping company having to vote on the size of shipping containers, and then Starbucks having a vote on what kind of coffee to offer… it all nearly guarantees that I won’t get the coffee I want. Paradoxically, their caring about what I want prevents me from getting what I want. Socialists will always be encumbered by ham handed execution of good intentions. Some systems are just too complex to micro manage. Capitalism will always prevail over socialism because of how lean and efficient it is.

I don’t fear national socialists because they tend to care about fear too much. The whole point of any empire is to be the top dog. After all, “the view doesn’t change unless you’re the dog in front” as they say. If you’re just a lowly peon, you have someone screaming down your throat for better results. Why? Because your superior has someone screaming down theirs. It’s a big pyramid of screaming people, afraid to make mistakes. Innovation spawns from taking risk. You could spend your whole life farming because, “Hey, it’s good enough. Taking the time to invent the plow might not be worth it.”

What do you think? Right? Wrong? Pure poppycock?